Give a Dog a Bone

A year into adopting our rescue pup, we seem to have hit a bit of a regression. Specifically: shoes. He’s suddenly enamored with them again, treating each pair like a personal invitation to chew. Our home now resembles a maze of baby gates, carefully arranged to protect shoes—and anything else of importance.

Last week, I hit a wall. I wasn’t flowing with the phase. I felt frustrated, tired of playing defense. That evening, my partner—who has a quiet way of noticing what a moment really needs—told me he’d simply been redirecting him. Each time our pup went for a shoe, or the edge of the carpet, he’d gently hand him a chew stick. No scolding, just: “Here, try this instead.”

It’s such a common approach in puppy training—simple redirection—but in the moment, it can feel like you’re failing. Didn’t we already work through this?

Reaching for some understanding, I thought back to a concept I’d learned in a training seminar somewhere: the J-Curve of growth. In both psychology and organizational change, it’s a well-documented pattern—performance or emotional steadiness often dips before it improves. Things can look messier, feel harder, and seem off-track right before real growth kicks in. That dip doesn’t mean failure. It means you’re in the middle of real change.

And in that dip, the work isn’t to push harder or correct louder. It’s to stay with it. Flow with it. Offer a tool that gets you through—something steady, familiar, actionable. A chew stick. A reminder. A supportive check-in. The point isn’t perfection. It’s to keep moving forward, gently, until the curve starts to rise again.

Whether you're training a dog, leading a team, or navigating your own creative season, there will be moments that feel like steps backward. But they’re often just the low point before a breakthrough—if we can stay present, stay kind, and keep offering something useful.

Sometimes, the best thing we can do—for them and for ourselves—is just to give the dog a bone.